Forever Love Read online

  I cautiously go back to own room, it’s a good job I'm alone since I probably look like a paranoid psycho at the moment, hey five minutes ago I would have looked like an obsessed stalker psycho so it’s a mild improvement. I chuckle to myself, realizing that I've probably cracked. I purposely try and make my life as simple as possible. I have a limited amount of friends to try and avoid all the bitchy drama that seems to cling to girls so much. I don’t have relationships because I don't want the trouble. Yeah, I know I come across as a pretty aloof bitch most of the time but that’s a lot easier than leaving myself open to pain and disappointment. Now here I am in probably the most stressful situation imaginable, hiding naked in closets, kissing step brothers in cars, kicking jackass' in the balls. Right now, my biggest worry is avoiding Noah forever, or at least until I can get my muddled thoughts in order.

  ***

  I'm dressed ready for battle in my red high waisted skater skirt with a white halter top with a sweetheart neckline. I'm wearing a pair of brown Nine West wedges, my hair pin straight, my nails a fire engine red. Its Sunday night and I've officially avoided Noah for forty one hours, yep still counting. I feel like a Secret Agent with all the moves I've had to pull to avoid him. After feigning sickness yesterday to get out of dinner, today I was forced to make a miraculous recovery just to stop Pam faffing about me.

  I'm being forced, yes forced to go down for dinner tonight, since my excuse is now fucking void. Apparently it’s a special occasion what with Noah and me starting our Senior year tomorrow and Chase his Freshman. Poor kid, he's dumb as wood and they're gonna eat him alive. I walk down the stairs, careful not to trip in my obscenely high wedges. I could have probably gone down in sweats but I wear my clothes like armor. If I look good, I feel good. I give Sylvester, who is sitting on the bottom step a wide berth. Fucking furball has really made an enemy outta me, evil little shit. Chase is sitting on the couch playing one of his video games on his XBOX.

  "Hey, where is everyone?"

  "Moms in the kitchen and Phil and Noah have gone to the store." The kid doesn’t take his eyes from the screen for a second.

  "Oh, whatcha playing?"

  "Battlefield"

  His fingers are bashing all over the controller as I watch as someone's brains gets blown out on the screen, making me flinch. No wonder kids are so fucked up today if this is the shit theyre playing in their spare time. I walk through to the large kitchen, there are pots and pans filling the sink, bowls of food littering the countertop and Pam looks about five minutes from a total meltdown.

  "Need any help?" I ask, making her jump and nearly drop the tray she's holding.

  "Oh Liv, you scared me. I think I was a little too ambitious with this meal."

  "That’s a whole lot of food."

  "Oh shoot, I completely forgot to tell you, what with you being sick, my mother is coming to dinner tonight." She gestures at the mess. "She'll love this. Anything to snipe at me about."

  I clap my hands together, taking in the devastation that is the kitchen. For someone like Pam, I'm sure this is pure hell.

  "What can I do to help?"

  "Liv, you're a sweetheart. If you could get the plates from in that top cupboard and some glasses out of the one next to the fridge. Oh, and make them the crystal wine glasses, Mother likes things to be perfect." She grimaces as she says this and It probably mirrors my own look when I have to spend time with the Bitch.

  I walk over to the cupboard, my wedges thankfully giving me some extra height when reaching for the glasses. I still haven't had time to fully look around the house. It's hard to believe I've already been here four days. The Bitch hasn’t called, of course I never expected her to. I'm sure my Dad's happy for the respite from her constant whining in his ear about my so called exploits.

  "So, how was the party the other night? Did you make any new friends?"

  Her question catches me off guard. I think it's wise that I don’t tell her about her son punching some ass for touching me and then my steamy make out session with said son in his car. Yep, I think it's best I keep that info to myself.

  ***

  Dinner is beyond uncomfortable. You can cut the tension with a knife. Pam's mother, Martha, has her attention focused solely on me and it's really starting to fuck me off. I've more than once had to remind myself that this is an old lady, otherwise I would have bitch slapped her ass by now.

  "You know Liv, you'd make a very nice beauty queen." My Dad's knife and fork clatters onto his plate. It's been like this all night.

  "Mother." Pam draws out the word in warning, though the old bat doesn’t take any notice.

  "Oh quiet Pamela. You know, Olivia, I was a beauty queen. I was Miss Georgia 1969. Of course, when I had a daughter, I wanted her to follow if my footsteps but I got oh mousy brown over there who certainly didn’t have what it takes. Then when she had children, I got lumbered with Bert and Ernie over here. I think my luck maybe changing though because you definitely have what it takes."

  I'm not sure what part pisses me off more, the way she's just described her family or the fact that the old biddy thinks id stand in front of a crowd in a bikini spouting off some dribble about world fucking peace. I mean, that’s just laughable. This woman sure is a piece of work and I'm itching to put her in her place.

  "I think Pam would have made a stunning beauty queen." I say giving her a tight smile that’s just about killing me. That comment gets the first smile of the night from Pam and not the first frown from Martha.

  "Oh no dear, she was a real disappointment. You though, you'd be like the daughter I've always wished for."

  Oh, hell no. This lady's cuckoo, I've already got one bitch to cope with back in Atlanta, I don’t need another one here.

  "Well, you definitely remind me of my Mother." That gets a snort out of my Dad and Noah, who I've avoided looking at all night.

  She leans towards me, as if sharing a secret.

  "I still have some connections in the pageant world. You’re a little older than I would have hoped but that can't be helped. It's best to take advantage of your looks before they fade dear."

  "No thank you Martha. Liv won't be doing pageants, she's got school to focus on." My Dad says sharply, causing the old witch to scowl at him.

  I chance a look at Noah who looks incredible fuckable when hes angry, his jaw twitching, his fists clenching and unclenching. He's too busy staring at his plate as I look at him. When he looks, our eyes meet and I see a brief look of longing pass over his features before its gone again. The whole room disappears around me as I stare into his green orbs.

  I've spent nearly two days avoiding him and as I look over him, I can't fathom why I would avoid this gorgeous guy. The feelings he brings out are just too damn much though.

  Dinner continues in much the same manner, Martha trying to drag me into the damn pageant world and my Dad constantly shooting her down. Pam looks more and more down as the night continues and I'm more than happy when we're all told to go to bed early under the excuse that we've got school in the morning. From the way my Dads jaw is shifting, I'm sure it has more to do with getting us away from the viper than our sleeping patterns.

  I sit on my bed, sending Trina a long text with the happenings of the night which has become routine since I got here. I've found it hard not seeing her everyday. I feel like I've lost a sibling but I take comfort in the fact that I'll be seeing her in Savannah soon. There's a knock at my door and I know who it is without even opening it. Might as well get this shit over with.

  "Come in." I shout, trying to calm my nerves. I just hope I can control myself with us being alone and in such close proximity.

  He opens the door, coming in and Holy mother of God, all he has on are a pair of checkered pajama bottoms. His chest is completely bare. His toned and muscled body is on display and I take a deep gulp. I feel a little inferior in my Tatty Teddy pajama shorts and white t-shirt. He sits himself on my bed without saying a word. He takes a big breath as if building himself up f
or something.

  "Why did you run?" Though I should have expected this question, it still leaves me shocked, mainly because I don’t know how to answer.

  "It's too complicated." I answer, I don’t want to tell him the full messed up truth.

  "I can't stop thinking about you." He looks towards me and I fully take in his face. There are dark circles under his eyes as if he hasn’t slept a wink. Surely that’s not because of me though. Id be lying if his confession doesn’t send those oh so familiar butterflies soaring. "Ive been like this for fucking four days and it's driving me crazy. It was bad enough before the kiss but now." He rubs his hands over his face. "I was there Liv, I felt that kiss, I felt how you responded. You can act like it was a big mistake all you want but I know that’s not the whole story. I just want the truth dammit"

  I stand up and start to pace, dragging my hands through my loose waves.

  "I'm not the right girl for you Noah, what I'm about would make living in this house near on impossible when alls said and done."

  "And you think it's not impossible right now. I'm nearly losing my damn mind here and you've been hiding in your room for the past two days."

  "What do you want from me Noah?" My voice is a near whisper.

  "Your real reason for running, I guess. Give me something here, Liv."

  "I have casual sex with most half decent guys I meet. I can't have a proper relationship with a guy without feeling like the world is about to end. Is that what you wanna hear Noah? So yes I ran. You scare the fuck out of me. That kiss.......shit. I can't give you want. I can't be your fuck buddy because as soon as it ends this house will be a nightmare to live in for both of us. And deep down, I don’t think you want that kind of relationship with me, fuck buddies don’t punch guys for putting their arm around you. They don’t take you to romantic fields to look at the fucking stars. You scare me, hell you terrify me with the things I feel after four days. It's been four days Noah, what's it gonna be like after four weeks or four months." Noah sits there motionless, just staring at me. I've said way too much and feel a sliver of panic at the amount I've just told him.

  "So that’s what this is. Fear?"

  I close my eyes, he just doesn’t get it.

  "I'm not giving up Liv. You're not the only one that’s feeling unfamiliar feelings and they scare me too. I won't give up because there's a little voice inside my head that’s saying if we take a chance on this, it could be the best thing that’s ever happened to both of us."

  I'm left speechless, my hearts beating out of my chest. The butterflies are doing all kinds of tricks in my stomach. I stand there, just staring at the delectable guy now standing in front of me, telling me he's not gonna give up, that he thinks I'm the best thing that could ever happen to him. He comes closer as I stand there completely immobile. I don’t think I could move if I wanted to. He bends a little towards me, giving me a soft gentle kiss on the corner of my mouth that sends tingles over my lips. I close my eyes and soak up the feeling of his mouth on my own, even if for just a second. He comes close to my ear.

  "I'm not giving up Liv. I'm the guy for you and I'm gonna damn well make you see it too." He whispers in my ear, causing goosebumps to rise on my skin.

  And then he's gone, Maybe I'm crazy, maybe I've finally lost my mind but deep down, there's a part of me that hopes he's right.

  Chapter 7

  Liv (Again)

  I storm into the kitchen, ready to have a total bitch fit. My Dad's sitting at the counter reading his morning paper and everyone else is God knows where. I'm instantly grateful that Noah's not here as I've had enough of picturing his face all night as it is. To say I'm in a pissy mood would be the understatement of the year.

  "That’s it, I've had enough of that little fucker. He's gotta go."

  My Dad sighs and lowers his paper as if I'm being a big fucking inconvenience with my little girl problems.

  "Language Liv."

  "Control the rodent and I wouldn’t feel the need to use my so called language."

  "What's happened?" I drop my soiled shoe on the countertop in front of him. See how fucking blasé he is when there's fucking shit where he eats.

  "That damn cat shit in my shoe."

  Of course at that moment, everyone else has to come walking through the door. Noah, with his tight blue t shirt and light faded jeans makes me lose my train of thought for a second. He looks a whole lot better than I do with my clothes half hazardly thrown on and my hair a wet mess.

  "What did Sylvester do?" Pam says all concerned and shit.

  It's her fucking cat so its her fucking fault in my book. I point to my precious taupe Kurt Geiger chunky sandal lying on the countertop. Everyone gathers round it like it's some alien autopsy.

  "Your cat crapped in my two hundred dollar shoe. He-" I have to take a deep breath to calm myself before I run up the stairs and strangle the little poufed up fucker. "He looked at me as he fucking did it."

  The room is silent, apart from Chase whose trifling through the cupboards. Everyone bursts out laughing. Un-fucking-believable. Maybe I should shit in all their shoes, see how they like it.

  "Aaaaaaaaaarrrrggggghhhhhhh" I screech as I storm back out the room up the stairs.

  My Dad the traitorous bastard is meant to be on my side and Noah, yeah this a great way to win me over. I slam my bedroom door, causing the wall the shake as I turn to look at my one surviving shoe. I swear I only left the room for fifteen damn minutes to come back to the cat squatting over my new shoes. I fight the urge to throw the shoe outta the window, maybe it would land on one of their windshields, bet they wouldn’t think it was oh so funny then. I grab my hairdryer from the drawer, plugging it in and then blasting my hair. Since apparently Sylvester the little asshat furball is an inside cat I'm considering just leaving the front door open for the ratfaced fucker.

  I've had about two hours of sleep, I couldn’t close my eyes without seeing Noah's green pools staring back at me. If that wasn’t bad enough, it's my first day at a new school and I look like shit. Aaaah who cares if I'm a little late anyway, my appearance is much more important than some diploma. Damn I sound just like Pams mom. That woman's enough to make me consider gaining a hundred and fifty pounds if it will get her off my back. Woman seems to think I aspire to be Honey fucking Boo Boo.

  I straighten my hair and I don’t know what the hell I was worried about, it looks great. I pull off my clothes that I'd set out before my shower. I'd chucked them on quickly after finding the cat using my shoe as a litter box. They're all damp now. I browse through my closet, pulling along hangers. I need to look good for my first day.

  I settle on a sun dress, it's got a pale blue skirt and white top with a bandeau neckline. It shows more than enough leg, since it's one or the other. There are too many sluts about that don’t get you either show a lot of leg or a lot of chest, never both. I put a red shimmer gloss on my lips. My flat Fendi sandals finish my look and I think I look pretty damn good. The fact that I look good definitely puts me in a better mood and now I'm not quite ready to kill a bitch.

  ***

  I don’t know what Noah's idea of making me see he's the guy for me is but it sure is different to mine. Mine would be not pissing me the hell off. So now I'm stuck in the car with him on the way to school since he insisted I had to drive with him because I don’t know my way. Hasn’t he heard of a Sat Nav? I haven't driven my precious Mini in days and to be perfectly honest, I was hoping for a little alone time on the drive to school to clear my thoughts. I really don’t need to be starting my day at a new school with my mind in disarray which is precisely what is happening with Noah in such close proximity. If that wasn’t bad enough, we're completely alone. Chase decided that it was social suicide for him to turn up on his first day at High school with his big brother so he caught the bus.

  We've now been in the car for ten minutes and Noah still hasn’t spoken a word which is more than unsettling. Every now and again I'll catch him staring at my legs out of the corner
of my eye, which is the only sign that he even knows I'm still in the car. The silence is deafening, not even the radio is on. I can't take it anymore.

  "I can drive you know. I don’t need a chauffeur."

  "Yep the midget-mobile in the driveway was a big hint that you can drive."

  Seriously, what the hell is wrong with this guy? Last night he's telling me he can't stop thinking about me and he's not letting me go and now he's being a total jackass.

  "PULL OVER!" I yell.

  He looks at me with wide eyes as he makes a sharp turn to the side of the road on the quiet street.

  "What's up? Are you sick?" Oh so he's been a total asshole for the entire drive and now he's all concerned.

  "Yes, I'm sick of you. What the fuck is your problem? You’ve been a total jerk since we got in the car. I mean, why the hell did you kick up such a fuss to drive me if you're just gonna be a tool?"

  He runs his hands through his hair. He doesn’t look as tired as he did yesterday, actually he looks pretty drool worthy is you ask me. He turns an apologetic look my way that just makes him look completely adorable.

  "I'm sorry I've been a dick."

  "Well why were you?" I'm really struggling to hold onto my annoyance with that look on his face. Maybe I should stick a bag on his head or something, I'm sure I could stay pissed at him then.

  "Why'd you wear that?"

  HUH?!

  "Wear what?" I look down at my outfit, trying to work out what the hell he's talking about.

  "That dress. Oh fuck." He's back to running his fingers through his hair and I'm completely lost. "I'm gonna get suspended the first day of school, guys are gonna be all over you in that."